PS I Love You
by Mrs. Witter
Summary: If you love someone you say it, you say it right then, out loud. Otherwise the moment just… passes you by.
1. Part One

Disclaimer: I do not own the characters from _Gilmore Girls _as they belong to Amy Sherman Palladino and the WB. I have borrowed the story title from an episode of almost the same name. Oh and I don't own My Best Friend's Wedding which was quoted in the summary. Really people.

Rating: PG – 13

Part: One of two.

Dedication: To everyone who encouraged this fic when they shouldn't have. You know who you are.

Author's Note: I feel like I should explain why I wrote this when I have so many fics. But I won't.

Sometimes new love comes between old friends… 

-- Reality Bites

Somewhere between college and the real world, I fell in love.

Well, stumbled into love is more like it. I figure that when you love, as passionately and unrealistically as I did, you won't fall in love – you'll stumble into it. You'll stumble and trip and fall flat on your face, not really knowing how you got there in the first place. 

It crept up on me, even though it had been gradually building up inside of me since I first met him. Kind of like the pile of laundry that accumulates in my mom's room sometimes and then she finds her self buried in dirty clothes when she trips over a pair of high heels that she left lying on the floor the day before. No matter how many times I tell her she'll really get hurt one day, she doesn't listen until she falls.

Huh, someone should have _warned_ me.

This love took me by surprise and I hated it. Hated _him_. Flip side, same coin and all that.  I sort of did hate him in the beginning of our tumultuous…acquaintance. We never were really friends before. That came afterward - after his façade had dropped and my innocence had dimmed. Back then, if anyone told me that in the future that I would fall for him, I would have had an aneurysm or something equally pathological. 

But Tristan DuGrey has a way of sneaking up on you and permanently rooting himself in your life whether you like it or not. 

I was on my own, fresh out of Stars Hollow and he was back from military school in all his be-all-you-can-be glory. And he was going to attend Yale. At first, we kept our distance, trying to settle into our new lives, makes new friends and juggle all our work. But we saw each other more, shared a few freshman classes. Later, when he decided he wanted to minor in journalism we saw more of each other and he would seek me out for help in homework.

Much to my surprise, we became friends.

By junior year, he was one of my most trusted confidantes. We'd have lunch or dinner. We'd catch a movie, take walks, and spend time on the phone discussing anything and everything we could come up with. He came to Stars Hollow one Thanksgiving to meet my family. We did everything two people who were extremely close, who trusted each other and cared about each other would do. Once in awhile, I would even accompany him to his parent's house or to a party under the pretense of being his girlfriend or date. 

Then, all of a sudden, I didn't want to pretend anymore.

I mean, he wasn't my type. Sure, I liked him and he was fun to hang out with but he was still…Tristan. There was still times when he'd bug the hell out of me, tease me mercilessly. There were times we'd have huge fights, hurting each other with words. I could still look at him and see the boy I knew in high school - the arrogance, the pride, the cockiness, and the smirk. That infuriating smirk. 

Oh and I didn't even want to think of the women. Because there were lots. If high school was the minor leagues then college was Tristan's major league breakthrough. One would think that girls who got into Yale would be more sophisticated and smarter…more immune to his charm. Unfortunately, I had yet to meet someone who hadn't fallen under his spell. I had actually prided myself for my being the only one…until now, I guess.

Did I mention how much I hated this?  

He was the Pacey to my Joey. The Spike to my Buffy. The Patrick to my Kat, the Darcy to my Elizabeth…you get the idea. Given the way all those couples started and ended, I should have known.  

It was something straight out of a teen romance. Being a senior in one of the world's most prestigious colleges, I thought that I was past the angst and drama of first loves and relationships. I assumed that I had grown up from love triangles and running away from boys I had just kissed. 

Looking back, those relationships all seemed to lack something essential. With Tristan, and the feelings that consumed me, that I was drowning in - they all seemed very, very real. It was that feeling where you looked at someone and just knew, without any reservation that they were _the_ one. 

I can remember the exact moment it hit me. I was complaining (or bitching) to my roommate (who had been studying for an exam) about the latest airhead to hang on Tristan's arm…a bimbo named Muffin or something and she got fed up, closed the textbook and fixed me with a death glare. 

"Have you ever thought about why these women Tristan dates bugs you so much?" she asked, looking completely pissed. I knew from experience you didn't try to talk when Paris Gellar was that angry. But since she asked a question, I tried to answer. My mouth opened but no words came out. She sighed, grabbed the books off her desk and as she stormed out of the room she yelled, "Figure it out, Gilmore. You're a smart girl."

All of a sudden, I was Cher in _Clueless_ realizing she was in love with Josh. Well, sans the fountain and romantic music. No, in real life, there is no soundtrack. There's just this moment where it seems like your world has shifted subtly off balance for a millisecond and then, it's just as subtly shifts back again but you're not the same anymore.

I lowered myself onto my bed, hands shaking and knees weak. I was in love with Tristan.

After that, I was a wreck. Finals were approaching, the workload was increasing, plans for the summer were being made, my mother was calling at odd times with news about my siblings' achievements and I was completely shaken up. 

I denied my feelings first; hoping they were just not there. But two days after my epiphany, I ran into Tristan in the library and I couldn't fight it anymore. He greeted me with a smile, touched my arm in a gesture that was meant to be friendly like it had been a thousand times before but this time, it made me excited and dizzy and anxious all at the same time. 

All my senses were in overdrive. His eyes seemed bluer, his laugh sounded sexier, he smelled of soap and cologne and my toes curled. His lips were more inviting and as he talked, I kept wondering how they would feel against mine. I kept trying to recreate our one and only kiss in high school in my head, trying to relive the sensation. 

I was in love with my best friend and what did I have to show for it? One kiss, a lifetime ago at a party. A kiss that we agreed meant nothing. 

Would that be the only kiss we'd ever share? I asked myself over and over again, fearing the answer was a big fat yes. Would I always feel the way I did in the library every time I saw him from now on?

Would I love him forever without him ever knowing, without us ever having a chance?

These questions were driving me insane. It was the scariest feeling for me to lose myself so completely in someone where all I could think about was what I would say when I saw him next, how I would act. I am not completely sure how I got through studying for my finals. Perhaps, I was on autopilot. 

One night, during a study break, I was sitting in my dorm room and watching _My Best Friend's Wedding _to get my mind off of all my problems. A word to the wise: never watch a romance on screen when your own love life is in shambles. It can never end pretty. I was sitting with a box of Kleenex as I rewound the tape and watched a particular scene over and over again, crying my eyes out - the scene where Michael and Julianne are on the ferry. 

"_Kimmy says if you love someone you say it, you say it right then, out loud. Otherwise the moment just..." _Michael tells her as the ferry passes under the bridge.

"_Just passes you by_," Julianne finishes as he trials off. 

And there it was.

I couldn't just take this love sitting down anymore. I couldn't define my relationship with Tristan on how many times he smiled at me or laughed at my jokes or pulled me into a hug. Not anymore.

I wanted more. Needed it. 

So I decided to do something about it. 

"I'm going to tell him," I announced to Paris and our other roommate Raina Chambers, as we were getting ready for a party at a fraternity. Paris had met this guy and she was dragging the two of us there with her as she tried to get him to notice her. College life had loosened Paris up. Go figure.

"Tell who what?" Raina asked a little distracted with the zipper of her dress.

"Tristan," I replied calmly and looked at myself in the mirror. "I'm going to tell him how I feel. Tonight at the party. I realize it's not the most romantic of settings but I figured, what do I have to lose?"

"Uh, possibly one of your best friends," Paris pointed out, adjusting her peach bra strap underneath her pink dress. 

Raina scowled at her as I felt all the blood from my face drain away. She was absolutely right. If I told him and he didn't feel the same way - we could never be friends again. Not like we were before.

"Honey," Raina drawled in her southern accent as she clipped her honey-blonde hair with a barrette. "Don't listen to her. I've been just dyin' to see you and that fine boy wise up and get together. Y'all carry on as if you're a couple, anyways. I say you tell him how you feel and let it go from there. It's a risk, dahlin, but it's worth taking." 

"You're sure?"

"Paris and I tried getting our hooks in that boy and failed," she paused momentarily to grin brightly at a scowling Paris before she continued, "maybe third time's the charm."

The pep talk had been given and I walked to the frat house, a bundle of nerves. The music seemed so loud, the house seemed too crowded and the punch left a bitter taste in my mouth – I couldn't tell if it was from nerves or because it was spiked. 

Then he showed up, girl dangling from his arm as he talked to his buddies. Seeing him reinforced my fear and I was ready to head for the door and leave when his eyes met mine across the room and he waved. I know it's silly, stupid and clichéd but he spotted me, grinned and for a single second, everyone else just…faded away.

"Well don't you look out of place," he teased at he approached me, taking the glass of punch out of my hand. I shuddered a little at the contact and then chided myself for being so jittery. It was just Tristan. "This stuff tastes like feet."

I laughed a little, suddenly feeling completely at ease. "Like you've ever tasted feet." 

"What are you doing here, Rory?"

"I like parties," I deadpanned. He slung an arm around my shoulder. The butterflies were back. I closed my eyes as I took in the scent of his cologne and soap and before I could stop myself, I blurted out, "You smell nice."

He chuckled and squeezed my shoulder playfully. "Can't resist it anymore, huh, Gilmore? " 

"Oh yeah, I'm dying to get you in bed tonight, Tristan." Which wouldn't be bad at all. In fact, my mind chooses that moment to daydream vividly about Tristan and me, in bed. I cleared my throat and tried to keep my voice as aloof as possible. "Where's the flavor of the week? What's her name, Bambi?"

"Bambi was last week," he replied, unruffled by my teasing. "Her name's Claire."

My eyebrows furrowed; he usually went after the ones named after food or something. "She sounds smart."

"That's 'cause she is," he answered with a withering look in my direction. "Pre-med."

For the first time in my life a girl that Tristan was dating intimidated me. It was disturbing and belittling and almost had tears stinging. _Don't cry, don't worry and stay cool_, I kept repeating too myself. I had known him longer, loved him in some way longer. It had to pay off, right?

"Sounds serious."

"We're just having fun," he replied with a nonchalant shrug. That was a good sign. Tristan and I always had loads of fun together. "She's very sweet."

Oh boy.

 Deep breath. One, two three…"Tristan, can we talk?"

"That's what we're doing, silly."

"No I mean, somewhere less…crowded. Privately," I said, placing a hand on my stomach to settle my nerves. 

"I'm intrigued. Let's go see if we can find a room where people aren't screwing," he stated cheerfully and I swatted him on the arm. He led me up the stairs and Raina saw us, and gave me two thumbs up and look that said 'looks like someone's getting lucky'. I shook my head vehemently and she frowned. Tristan found a room that a drunken couple had just vacated and once we were inside, he locked the door behind him. "How much do you wanna bet that they don't remember they had sex in the morning?"

I made a face even though my back was to him. The room smelled of alcohol and stale sex and only made me sick. "I don't even wanna _think_ about what happened in here." 

"Of course not, _Mary_…so what did you wanna talk about?" 

I turned to face him, fear a solid ball in my stomach, my pulse tripping and my heart hammering against my ribcage. It was just the two of us. The loud conversations muffled and the music only heard through the vibrations in the room. The reality of what I was about to do – the potential damage I was about to cause – hit me full force and I did the only thing one could do.

I stalled.

"How'd your finals go?" I asked lamely, wringing my hands together. Maybe telling him in the flow of normal conversation was the best way to go. _How's the weather tomorrow? What ya doing this weekend? Oh I'm in love with you, by the way. Wanna go catch a movie? _Hey, it could work.

He crossed the room, closing the distance between us and involuntarily, I took a step back. He didn't notice and continued to inspect the room, stopping at the mantle to look at a picture. "Ah, you know, great. As always." 

"That's good."

"What?" he asked surprised and stopped in front of me. "No comeback about my arrogance. Not even a 'get over yourself, Tristan'?" He placed a hand on my forehead and looked at me worried. "Are you feeling okay?" 

"Cut it out," I snap, a little on edge and he looks shocked. I give him an apologetic smile and run a hand through my hair. "Sorry."

Now he looks genuinely worried and tips my chin up between his forefinger and thumb. "What's bothering you, Ror? You know you can tell me anything." 

It was the softness in his voice, the familiar look in his blue eyes and the earnestness in his words that soothed my fear, calmed my nerves. He had come to mean so much to me and I felt so much for him that I needed to just tell him. I wanted to know what it would be like when I told him and see his expression.

I took a steadying breath as I brought my gaze to his. Now or never. "I love you."


	2. Part Two

Disclaimer: I do not own the characters from _Gilmore Girls _as they belong to Amy Sherman Palladino and the WB. I have borrowed the story title from an episode of almost the same name. Oh and I don't own My Best Friend's Wedding which was quoted in the summary. Really people.

Rating: PG – 13

Part: Two of two.

Dedication: To everyone who encouraged this fic when they shouldn't have. You know who you are.

Author's Note: This is the last part. There is nothing after this. I may never do a sequel so please, no tomatoes.

_…Sometimes the best love is the one that was always there._

-- Reality Bites

Ever have one of those moments where you hear what you have just said a couple of seconds after you've said it and the words sound so much better in your head? Yeah, I was having one of _those_ moments. Big time.

It's kind of like when you build these scenarios in your head a thousand times over, trying out different ways to say things, expecting different reactions from the person you want to say them to and then, when you finally do – they never quite turn out the way you want them to. 

The reality never lives up the fantasy. 

How could it? Hoping that it will is stupid and perfect. We don't live in a perfect world so that leaves you looking like the biggest fool to walk the face of the planet. And that's exactly what I was the minute those three little words slipped out of my mouth. A big fat fool. No one in the entire world had ever been that degree of foolish until that very moment. In fact, the foolishness of it all could not have been measured. 

I love you. Really, it's hard to imagine those innocent words could 'cause so much trouble. I mean if you think about it, all the greatest loves stories ended so tragically. Catherine and Heathcliff. Romeo and Juliet. My mom and dad. 

In the grand scheme of things, did I even stand a chance? 

What made it worse was that he just stood there with an expression that would have been comical if I was in the laughing mood. His hand fell away from my face and he took a step back, in a knee-jerk reaction more than anything else, I figured. Why else would he look like someone had just punched him the gut, right? 

Damage control. I was so bad at damage control. 

"Tristan. Did you hear what I said?" There was a part of me that wished that he hadn't and the reason he look so scared was because there was a giant, mutated lizard behind me. That would have been infinitely better. 

He nodded slowly, avoiding my gaze and I just knew that the slim possibility of him saying those words back was completely nonexistent. It was funny, that for the first time in my life I was willing to say those words, and this time, it was the boy who didn't feel the same. It must've been the bad karma from all the relationships where I was a crappy girlfriend or didn't know how to handle situations and made them worse. 

But I didn't have time to feel sorry for myself or wallow so I took in a steadying breath and tried to be strong about it. I don't know how I managed to keep my voice so calm. "Well, okay. So you heard it, then. Huh, I'm not even sure why I said it but it's out there. And you're obviously still in some sort of shock or something so I'm just going to…you know, leave and head back to my room and..." _Wait for the world to open up and swallow me_. "Okay then. Bye." 

I pushed past him in my haste to get out of there and ran down the stairs, the tears in my eyes blurring my vision. I heard Paris calling me as I ran out the door but I didn't stop to acknowledge her. I just needed to get away, from the music, from the suffocation, from the hurt. Running was, after all, what I did best. 

"Rory!"

I was halfway across the lawn when I heard him call out my name and only then did I stop. Hope, as painful as it was, soared in my heart as I turned around to face him, trying my hardest to hold back more tears.

"You can't just say something like that to me and run away!" he protested as he stood in front of me. "You have got to break that habit."    

I didn't hear that he was admonishing me but could only think one thing: he came after me. That had to mean something! There was a chance; I could feel it. His words registered and gave him an apologetic smile. "Sorry." 

So we stood there, panting slightly and staring at each other. The moment stretched, while I kept waiting for him to say something and he kept staring at me as if he's seen me for the first time. 

"Did you mean it?"

Okay, so I wasn't expecting that. But I sort of understood why he was asking me; he didn't quite believe what I had just told him. Hell, I didn't believe it myself. This was my cop out. It would have been so easy just to pretend that I hadn't said it and that is was a joke. Without knowing it, he was giving me a choice to run again. Just like that.

But, I was tired of running. "Yeah, I did."

He nodded again, ran a hand through his hair and again, I waited for him to say something. Why couldn't he say anything? For as long as I'd known him, Tristan DuGrey, always had something to say. The silence was killing me, the uncertainty was putting me in limbo; did he feel the same way or did I just ruin our friendship? 

"Tristan?" a soft voice called from behind him and he turned to reveal his date, Claire, standing on the lawn, looking a little apprehensive. I took a good look at the competition – blonde hair (of course), blue eyes, pretty face, modest dresser…who was I kidding? She was a knock out! And to top it off, she was smart, sophisticated and classy.

She was going to win.

She glanced at me and then back at her date. "I was looking all over for you." 

_Back off! He's mine_, I wanted to yell at her so I bit my bottom lip, clobbered my inner bitch and dragged her back to her cage and waited for Tristan to tell her to go back inside so we could finish our discussion. 

"Sorry Claire. Do you want to leave?" Tristan apologized, turning away from me completely. The symbolism of it was not lost on me.

Claire nodded, scrunching her face. "Yes! I don't know how I convinced you to bring me to a frat party."

He let out a laugh. "It's because I'm charming."

Claire rolled her eyes. "Or at least you'd like to think that you are."

I stood there, feeling like the biggest fool on the planet as they bantered. I _bantered _with Tristan. It was our thing; something we did effortlessly, easily. No one could keep me on my toes as well as he could and now…

He turned back to me then and the smile on his face vanished, he cleared his throat and gave me a serious look. "Do you mind if we continue this later, Ror?"

_Oh no, _I thought to myself bitterly. _I don't mind. Go canoodle with your doctor while I go and cry my eyes out. _Somehow, I kept my voice from wavering when I spoke. "No, it's okay. I was going to go, anyway."

~*~ 

He didn't love me and it sucked. 

But what sucked more was that he avoided me. I could understand and accept that he didn't feel the same way – hell, I had even prepared myself for the possibility that he didn't love me. It was like a knife through my heart and I felt like there was a big gaping hole in me but I was aware of it, I could deal with it. 

What I couldn't deal with was that I had lost one of my best friends.

"I can see it now," I complained miserably to Paris and Raina the next day as we packed, getting ready to say goodbye to our college years. "We'll see each other at some reunion party years from now and he'll have his doctor draped on his arm and she'll still be beautiful and successful. The kids will be with the nanny, of course. And he'll look at me briefly trying to put a name with a face. 'Sweetheart,' he'll say to her. 'This is Lori Gilmore. We went to college together.' And I'll say, 'Rory Gilmore.' 'Oh right, sorry.' he'll say and wave his hand in the air like it doesn't matter."

Paris grinned wryly. "After all, he never could get your name right."

"Shut up."

"Now don't you go listenin' to her, dahlin," Raina chided. "To think that Tristan DuGrey could ever forget you is just plain silly."

Okay, so maybe my histrionics had gotten the best of me but it still didn't change the fact that Tristan was avoiding me and when I called, he always seemed to be out. Come graduation, my pain had turned into anger and I had resolved never to speak to him again. If he was going to let my feelings get in the way of our friendship, I figured he wasn't worth it.

Or that's what I kept telling myself. 

Graduation day. My last day as a Yalie. My mom was bringing a whole entourage of people with her from Stars Hollow, Dad, Sherry and Gigi were in attendance and both sets of grandparents. So many people to share my happiness with.

And I still had to stop myself from stealing glances, looking for a glimpse of tousled blond hair and patented smirk. 

Fortunately for me, after the commencement ceremony, he came looking for me. My mother nudged me and pointed him out, and then pushed me in his general direction. 

"Meet him halfway, sweets," she advised and I reluctantly took a few steps closer.

"Hey," he greeted as he approached.

My eyes widened and I controlled the urge to hug him. And to slap him for avoiding me because he had not returned my phone calls and because he had seemingly forgotten our friendship. "Hey."

"So, the whole extended family's here, I see," he stated with a grin, looking over my shoulder at the assortment of the people dearest to me. "How is that going?"

"Oh I don't know how I manage," I reply with a wry grin. "There haven't been any catfights or punches thrown so far. But then again, you never know with them. I see the DuGreys are here, in harmony too."

He nodded, grinning a little. "On the surface, of course. As soon as this is over, they're heading off to parts unknown – separately."

I laughed a little and then we stood, staring at each other again while graduates and their happy parents passed us by. I cleared my throat and decided to break the silence because I needed to the most. "I called three times."

He looked away guiltily, twisting the knife a little deeper in my heart. "I know. I'm not gonna lie and say that I planned on calling you back, Ror."

I took in a shaky breath, willing back tears. "I understand if you don't feel the same- "

"I did once," he cut me off and this time held my wide-eyed gaze steadily. "When we met again. I mean, it started in high school but those feelings didn't have time to develop. And when I ran into you here and we started becoming friends, I couldn't stop thinking of you. It was real, it was hard and it was so fast."

To say his words shocked me would have been a massive understatement. I opened my mouth and tried to say something and when the words came out, I sounded like an invalid. "I d-didn't…you never told…"

"How could I?" he asked, waving his hand in the air and then running it through his messy hair. "You were always with someone else, interested in someone else. And we were becoming friends; you were finally learning to tolerate me. One night, Paris told me that it was hopeless, that you'd never see me that way." 

I registered that information and thought of buying a Paris voodoo doll. "She did, huh?"

"She was right, though," he replied, a muscle in his jaw twitching slightly. "You were everyone else's girl and I became the Will to your Grace – except I was straight which is even more pathetic if you think about it." When I didn't laugh at his attempt at humor, he stopped grinning and continued, "So I resolved to get over you, Rory."

I was compelled to ask the next question. "Did you?" 

He loosened his tie and let out a small, almost self-deprecating laugh. "It was hell. Kind of like getting over an addiction to alcohol or some drugs which I don't know about personally and it's all hearsay…"

Being compared to a drug was unnerving so I shifted uncomfortably, wrapping my arms around my midriff. "Tristan…"

"Yeah, sorry." He looked at me then, with that piercing gaze that was meant to be sincere and was breaking my heart. "It was one of the hardest things I ever had to do. But I got over you, Rory. It's something I don't ever want to do again."

And there it was: the words that I had expected him to say. I just hadn't prepared myself for actually hearing them. He had loved me once and I was too stupid and too clueless to realize it until it was too late. 

I knew my eyes were brimming with tears but I summoned all my courage to look at him and speak to him. "I'm sorry."

"Don't apologize."

"I realize that my declaration came at the most inopportune of moments in your life and I'm sorry about that, I'm sorry I jeopardized our friendship," I stopped a second when my voice hitched slightly and looked down at my hands, "and I know it may sound trite and hollow but I really do hope that you and Claire are happ- "

"Claire and I aren't dating anymore."

My head whipped up so fast, I'm sure something must've cracked. "What?"

"I broke it off with her the day after…after the party," he informed me with a shrug, his eyes never wavering. "It knew it wasn't going to work with her the moment I heard you say what you did."

Confusion seemed to be the only thing I could feel at that moment. I pressed a hand to my lips and closed me eyes, trying to process everything but by bit. "What does that mean, Tristan?"

"I don't know," he replied shortly and crossed his arms over his chest. "What I know is that you're my best friend and I don't want to lose you. You know I'd be a mess without you."

"You wouldn't last a day." I laughed through my tears. I stopped playing with the hem of my sleeve and wiped away the tears. "Honestly, I don't know if I can be your friend, Tristan. I don't want to lose you either but I think it's my time, _my turn_, to do the hardest thing I'll ever have to do."

He took a step forward and touched my elbow, gently moving me closer to him. His fingers trailed up my arms and then under my jaw to tilt it upwards. "It would be so easy to fall in love with you again, Gilmore. Almost too easy. I just don't know if I can risk it again, lose you and get over you again." 

Because I could understand the fear of giving in, I didn't refute the probability of us breaking up if we ever got together. In fact, it was the first time I had ever thought about Tristan and me not working out and ending disastrously. He was right: we could never go back if we crossed that line. 

"So what do we do?"

"Are you still planning on spending the summer in New York with Paris and Raina?" he asked, dropping his hand from my face and returning it to my elbow. I nodded slowly, not knowing where he was going with it. "I'm going to be in Europe."

I stepped back and nodded again, understanding settling in. "Space. We need space."

"And time, Rory," he replied softly. "Heaven knows we never had the timing down right. Seems only fair that we ask whoever it is up there for more, huh?" 

Nothing was fair to me at that moment, especially not the fact that the person I loved needed to put an entire ocean between us. I figured the running away thing was finally coming back to bite me in the behind. I tried not to sound bitter when I replied, "Of course."

"Tristan!" his father called from behind him 

"I have to go. Take care of yourself, Rory," he said as he backed away, a hint of a smile on his lips. The past blended in with the present and for a minute, I could see the sixteen-year-old boy who had robbed a safe and was being carted off to military school. 

Tristan was leaving, stepping out of my life again and I knew that this time, I had to say something. "Tristan?" 

He turned around, hands in his pockets. "Yeah?"

"I'll miss you."

He smiled and nodded slowly. "I'll miss you more." 

And maybe, that's just what I needed to hear.


End file.
